Phileena

For many traditional women or persons of imposed powerlessness, the invitation to die is all the more problematic. From a human-development-theory approach, traditional teaching of self-sacrifice and nonassertiveness when one is transitioning from the interpersonal to the institutional stage only serves to repress one from reaching her or his full potential—or the abundant life of which Jesus so often spoke. Teaching that emphasizes assertiveness, empowerment and self-development aids the transition. I think this is why men traditionally make this transition with fewer impediments. Historically, in most cultures, boys are afforded this support while girls receive a message that reinforces subordination, dependence and self-effacing, which traps them in the interpersonal stage and prevents them from progressing to the institutional stage. Under these circumstances, girls too often grow up to be women without a proper sense of self to freely sacrifice. Rather than force women to choose between self-preservation and the church, can we not imagine a community of Christ where all are free to grow and develop into their full selfhood and unique destiny as people created in the image of God? Why on earth do we want to repress in the institution (the church) what is meant to reflect the reign of Christ?

Phileena Heuertz, ‘Pilgrimage of a Soul,’ page 117. (via ifiblogged)

We are asleep to our unconscious motivations, and these motivations mask our true self. In essence we are hiding. And the wound in our soul remains unhealed, infecting every aspect of our lives. We are so asleep to our reality that we don’t know we are hiding behind the masks of our false self. In our slumber we are unable to distinguish between what is true and what is false. These masks become so familiar to us, they become a part of our very identity.

Phileena Heuertz, ‘Pilgrimage of a Soul,’ page 19. (via ifiblogged)

We don’t vindicate or sacramentalize suffering; we grieve it, but we can also embrace it as a lifestyle celebration. Let me explain. The perpetrator and perpetration of suffering are not excusable. But through Christ, companionship and hope are found in the midst of our suffering. And this is why we can celebrate it. Through suffering, the wounds of Christ are revealed, providing an invitation to intimacy with God. To the degree that we respond to the wounds, we experience intimacy with the One who suffered for us and bore our wounds. Drawing near to the wounds in our brothers and sisters around the world, while simultaneously acknowledging our own, allows for healing and transformation to take place. In this way we can understand the words of the Hebrew prophet Isaiah, “By his wounds we are healed” (Isaiah 53:5).

Phileena Heuertz, ‘Pilgrimage of a Soul,’ page 153 (via ifiblogged)

As my self-perception and understanding of what it means to be woman was being healed and transformed, so also was my perception of God. Early in sabbatical I had the sense that God wanted to reintroduce God’s self to me. Since so much of my understanding of God was shaped by masculine influence, my understanding was limited. And the distance I felt from God was caused in part by this misunderstanding. If God is perceived as male and men are often overpowering and all-pervasive, then there’s no room for me as a woman in relationship to God or men. But here was this revelation of God in Jesus who, as a man, doesn’t overpower, overshadow or impose himself. Though Jesus could fill the space of the world and is certainly self-sufficient, he restrains himself with remarkable discipline and control to make room for the other—all others, all of his creation. And he doesn’t stop there. Making room for the other, he invites us into a relationship of mutuality—giving and also receiving. Incredible. If the God of the universe can make room for me and recei

Fecundity. I love this word because it means more than being fruitful. It means having the capacity to bear an abundance of fruit. We like the thought of being fruitful, but we rarely examine what it requires of us to be fruit bearing—discomfort, pain, trial, patience, darkness and labor.

Fecundity speaks to the capacity for fruitfulness. Jesus of course understood this concept and explained it perfectly in pointing his disciples to grapevines. Comparing the connection to the vine with a connection to himself, he revealed the secret to being fruitful. The capacity for fruitfulness is found in relationship to him. That connection provides the capacity to bear real and lasting fruit. and if you appreciate a good glass of wine, you know what it takes to produce such exquisite vino. The endurance of the grape is equal to the quality of the wine it can produce. Good wine, like good life, requires arid conditions paired with tender care.

The female womb also symbolizes the ability to bear fruit. Fruitfulness doesn’t happen without the capacity for it to happen, and the monthly blood loss and pain presupposes a woman’s ability to bear a child. The woman’s body and feminine cycle is such important imagery for us and it’s a shame that we tend to overlook it. Patriarchal systems that divorce us from the feminine rob us of wisdom and perspective that men and women both need. Male and female are both created in the image of God. When we don’t allow ourselves to reflect on the feminine nature of God, our understanding of God is deficient. Similarly, our communities are deficient when they exclude women from central places of influence and authority.

Phileena Heuertz, ‘Pilgrimage of a Soul,’ pages 92-93. (via ifiblogged)